Of Self, Shell and Astrophysics

I want to tell you that FB is good!

Criticism is afloat about excessive facebooking, but just like that advert by Surf washing powder, (where the characters end up messing their clothes up in the process of doing something good) – blots  are good!

Well, my reply to a kin with whom I reconnected on FB after a quarter of a century gave me a flash of a beautiful realization that sorted out a confusion I had while I chatted up a budding psychotherapist.

My therapist friend said something about me in 2000 (it was NOT a session 🙂 ). I said I was still the same at core, though I might have changed observably. To which the friend claimed that there is nothing called core and shell about ourselves. “We are all processes”, said the friend.

That kind of shook me and I could not agree with that statement unqualified by something more. Could both not have been right? Do we have to choose the core-and-shell OR processes? Are we not both?

And this morning, when I was replying to my long-lost-and-found-again kin, I felt that perhaps my processes that make me ME, are like our universe.

I have been around for ages, and yet I am not the same – perhaps what I think I am today was someone else a generation ago (Mother? Father?). Stars, once magnificent, get shattered (Willingness to trust?). Some come crashing (feelings, for someone, that I thought were eternal?), but some others lose themselves so slowly as I keep moving around burning sun like a comet that refuses to leave the orbit (commitment to some roles that I love?). But then new stars form (I discover my talent?) … Matters of all proportions exist – tiny dust particles to huge galaxies and so much more of indescribable beauty in spite of dark zones, clouds, terrifying lightning and the unknown, unfathomable depth.

What reaches my conscious awareness from within my own self might have been light-years old, and I might not have ever suspected it was there.. Oh, yes, I know I AM those processes of destruction and regeneration.

And yet, I have the shell PROCESSES. Like the Sun that is a process of burning gases, it as been around for ages. Like the Earth bearing life for millions of years, I also have my forever-ness. That forever-ness might be threatened, may be vulnerable and fragile, but until the point of writing this, it has lingered.

In fact, whether I am a believer of a ‘always different because I am a process’ or ‘some part of me will never change’ itself is a core! Now that was my flash of the insight this morning when I acknowledged my kin’s post.

If someone asked me, I cannot snap an answer as to how many zeros are there in the light year if we expressed it as the number of kilometers light travels in a year. But my intuition tells me that I know it all. May be not mathematically. But then who says that mathematics is the only way of knowing the things around here? Tried Facebooking???


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