When I gaze at the physical sky, I see different constellations at the same hour but different times of the year. So it is with the skies of the mind. The surface, washed clean by the restive sleep or trans reveal beautiful expressions ashore from the memories. Of all of those, among the ones I love, are the words of Rabindranath.
But what has got me hooked to it since childhood is the seemingly irreconcilable the desires placed together, aimed at fulfillment at once:
The first group of “make me” expressions include NIRALASA, which means the one who knows not laziness, or is industrious, in short. (Now Herzberg would turn in his grave, won’t he? He might argue that being non-lazy is not necessarily equivalent to being industrious. But – for a beginner’s black-and-white conceptual world, this can be resolved in favor of the poet.)
But, quickly at its heels, in the second stanza follows desire to be YUKTA and MUKTA. Yukta is the one integrated, and the MUKTA is a liberated one. So – one has to be industrious to be connected and integrated, or to be free? How can an integrated one be free? If all one can be is part integrated and part liberated, then which part to integrated, what zones of being to liberate? With respect to whom to be tied, with respect of whom to be liberated?? Paradoxical!
That freedom is also loaded with MANGALA, which essentially is Shubha, or Kalyaanmay – in short what brings welfare to all concerned.
So – try being shubh, industrious, connected and free – that’s a mouthful of paradoxical living that does not fall from the sky – you have to struggle to the core of your very existence and wrench it from the challenges of social living and personal existence almost every minute.
And see the beauty again – next comes the final one – the desire to rest at the feet of the Ultimate, in a state of non-oscillation or non-vibration. Oscillation could be understood, but a state of non-vibration means not moving away into another state even for a second, not even for a beat – juuuuuuust peaceful. And it is nowhere else – that Ultimate is the One within. Deep within the deep recesses of my own Being.
Ah, I might have never been capable of such a wishlist. But now that I know some one made it, I so wonder how a reconciliation could be made among these. Surely it is not possible if one endlessly chases semantics (DukruN as Shankaracharya would call it). Nor is it even conceivable from the utilitarian point of view.
It’s only possible for a heart that is sensitive, deeply emotive, spiritual, capable of flights and comfortable with sleeping on dust, but having a gaze that is keenly set upon the distant, the global, the broad, the forgiving and the demanding.
THAT occupies my morning thoughts often when these words visit me out of blue: Antara Mama Vikasita Karo, Antara-tara He.